THE ’90S EXTENSION

I had a talk with my aunt last October that has stuck with me. It was about how I feel like Generation Z is living in a period where the trendy culture right now has very futuristic themes, but with a mixture and extension of the 90s culture?

Photo by @endka_1 (Katsiaryna Endruszkiewicz on Unsplash), Lollipop outfit, cherry image by @isiparente (Isi Parente on Unsplash)

It feels as if the 90s ended and a few years ago “came back” around the time of the Tumblr blogging era. I think us 20 year olds now are liking picturing us all in a world pre social media, while also being on social media. Similarly, in the early 2000s the Internet was a fun place for us millennials before social media because it felt freeing. It was at times dangerous with what we were exposed to, but it was fun and new. It’s funny, but I do understand the attraction to all of it. The late 90s to 2000s made a lot of us realize that we don’t have to succumb to the thought that the “online world” will consume us. And that you can be totally outrageous, flamboyant, and not have to adjust to whatever current trend mainstream society is pushing.

The 90s era also changed a lot (with teens in that era rejecting toxic ideals) and influenced who I became partly IMO. I read an article on Bustle where a doctor talks about our generation wanting to relive a time that we experienced at a period where we didn’t have many life obligations. While that may be true, to me the era of 90s California young adult films helped shape my aesthetic interests, to free my creative thoughts, to have my own mind, the future art I would create, and push the world to be more outside of the box.

Photo by @marceloraangeel (Marcelo Rangel on Unsplash)

I see the times of the 90s as when darker and edgier things came more to light, and caused more push back. It was inspiring to me. I sense that a lot of others around my age feel the same. It’s not the only generation that produces nostalgia, but I think it’s bigger than we know. And still affects us.

“INFAMOUS”: SOCIAL MEDIA FAME IN LATE NIGHT CINEMA

How does social media fame intertwine with obsession & violence? For some, attention goes to the head. Joshua Caldwell’s latest film “Infamous,” starring Bella Thorne & Jake Manley, shows how far one can go with their ego, and dives into adolescents experiencing today’s heavily saturated internet feeds in America. Can social media let you create your own destiny?

Poster for “Infamous”

How are you during this new normal period of quarantine?

I’m good. It’s been challenging having the kids home from school because my wife and I both work full-time. The trade off, of course, is we’ve had an enormous amount of time with the kids that we’ll never get back. So that’s been really special.

You’re a director, screenwriter, & producer. Tell us about your journey into the creative film world. Did you always see yourself working in a creative field?

I did. I discovered my love for filmmaking in high school and continued making films through college. One of those films, THE BEAUTIFUL LIE won me an MTV Movie Award and I moved to LA after college egotistically thinking I was going to be the next big thing. I was not. I wrote scripts, directed music videos, and hustled until I ended up with a job working for Anthony E. Zuiker, the creator of the CSI: franchise. I produced digital projects for him and got a lot of experience on the front lines of the industry. That was a lot of fun, but I was itchy to work on my own stuff and so in 2013 I directed my first feature film, LAYOVER, which I made for about $6000. Since then, I’ve directed three other features, including INFAMOUS, and a series for Hulu.

Your new film “Infamous” is about a lonely twenty something firecracker who wants her life to be bigger and more significant than it is. Arielle longs for something exciting and dangerous. When she finds another troublemaker who wants to start doing these mischievous activities with her, things go haywire. Would you like to tell us about the film and your inspirations behind it?

I was interested in the intersection of social media fame with its currency of likes and follows and violence and crime. Two things that seem to be uniquely American is our love of celebrities and fascination with crime. So, the framework of committing crimes in an effort to become famous felt both ridiculous and, unfortunately, not that far-fetched. 

It used to be that gatekeepers were making the decisions on who got press and who didn’t. But that’s all gone now. With nothing more than a phone anyone and everyone has the ability to create and reach an audience into the 10s of millions, if not more. And they never have to step out from behind that device.  I was fascinated by that collision of celebrity and crime, and I wanted to explore the most extreme version of it, which doesn’t feel all that extreme, really.

Still of Bella Thorne & Jake Manley in “Infamous.”

The film is very stylized with its fashion, visuals, and music.  Why did you choose the overall aesthetic you did?

I wanted to try and mimic the way in which content has changed as a result of social media, and yet still stay cinematic. So, we sought to make it a subjective experience for the audience, to show things from Arielle’s point of view. The idea was: the movie you’re watching is a version of Arielle’s social media feed. Everything you’re seeing is what Arielle wants you to see and how she wants you to see it. So, there’s a bit of a fantastical element to it. Beyond that, we brought in elements that are familiar to creators and consumers of social media based content: everything in the social media world is self-shot, so it feels very gonzo and it’s also had filters applied so it’s very colorful and bright. We shot handheld, long takes, made the image very bright and poppy and colorful. 

I just wasn’t interested in making some super dark and gritty looking film about the dangers of social media. In some ways, I almost wanted it to feel like we’re celebrating this empty, nihilistic pursuit of fame – because frankly, I think America celebrates it.

Still of Bella Thorne & Jake Manley in “Infamous.”

I find that you created such a fun film, while making it very serious and dark, and tongue in cheek. What was the filming process like?

It was one of the most difficult shoots for me and I’m sure for the rest of the crew. We had a very constrained prep schedule, we only had 21 days of production, and a limited budget. Every day we either had stunts, gunfire, multiple company moves, or big dialogue scenes.

That said, it was one of the most enjoyable and fulfilling shoots of my career. The crew was fantastic, the cast was a joy to work, the producers were so supportive of my vision and I never felt like I had to compromise. Plus, I’m getting to direct another film! So, I have absolutely no complaints. We had a blast.

Still of Bella Thorne & Jake Manley in “Infamous.”

To me, this film showed homage to the great late night 90s edgy road trip films. However, I think it really stands on its own. Especially with how it displays social media, violence, and greed with these young characters. Do you think that social media is getting more dangerous, when it comes to things like fame, money, and recognition?

I think Bella said it best recently which is social media is just a tool. It’s not inherently good or evil, but it can be used for both of those pursuits. It is a question about what should or shouldn’t go unchecked, where do we draw the line? In the case of the movie, I’m not so sure social media companies would take down Arielle’s post. You can imagine a social media company saying “We’re not law enforcement. These people haven’t been arrested or convicted by a jury, so who are we to say whether or not a crime has been committed?” and leave the post up because it’s getting eyeballs. And it would get eyeballs. We know that if this happened in real life we’d all be following it online. 

The main issue I see with social media is that the value proposition is quantitative not qualitative. So, if someone has 80 million folllowers and 50% are fake accounts, 25% hate-follow that person and 25% like-follow them, well none of that matters. All that matters is that 80 million number. So, if you hate follow or hate retweet, it’s irrelevant and in fact, ends up adding value to the account that you hate. On the other hand, a lot of good has come out of social media as well.

Ultimately, I’m not actually condemning social media. It’s a satire, asking questions about where we as a culture are willing to draw the line. 

There are some great performances by Bella Thorne, Jake Manley, & Amber Riley in this film. I loved how Bella’s character was so layered. She was powerful and strong, angry, damaged, unwell, but you were very drawn to what she was going to do next. You almost start to trust her and feel bad for her at some points. Is it important for you to display layered, strong, female characters in your films?

It is. I’ve always found myself drawn to female driven films with complicated female characters. I’ve tried to avoid the mother/wife/girlfriend trap of it all and instead create or bring to life women with agency, with attitude and aggression and frustration. Complicated and emotional but not reliant on emotion to tell that story. 

With Arielle I was deliberately interested in a character who was unapologetic in her desires, aggressive in going after what she wants, and not interested in or wanting your sympathy.  But also fun and sexy who owns her playfulness and sexual energy. She’s certainly one of the most batshit crazy characters I’ve thought up, and in collaboration with Bella she just leaps off the screen. You might hate her but you won’t forget her.

                                                                                       Still of Bella Thorne in “Infamous.”

Amber Riley had a small monologue in the film that really stuck with me. She says something along the lines of being a fan of the two main bank robbers (Bella & Jake’s characters,) for the reason that she wanted more excitement in her life. She then goes on to talk about how she went to art school, and nothing really came about her passion after that. Was this a moment that you ever felt in your own life?

No, not really. With Elle, I was interested in a counter-point to Arielle. Someone who is far more deserving of support and love (as empty as that love may be) and happiness. Elle is us: in debt, experiencing FOMO, drifting in our day to day…I think that’s why Americans have always been so interested in outlaws. They’ve bucked the system and seemed to be living their best selves (as terrible as those “best selves” may be). Meanwhile, the rest of America is stuck behind their phone watching other people do things and supporting that with clicks and likes. I think Amber Riley really nailed it and gave a pretty heartfelt performance. You felt her inability to figure out what a next step might be.

You can watch “Infamous” at select drive-in theatres in the US, iTunes, & PrimeVideo.

Official INFAMOUS Trailer

To follow Joshua Caldwell’s next steps in film, you can follow him at:

Instagram- @joshuacaldwelldirector

Twitter- @joshua_caldwell

Website-  Joshua Caldwell

MEET SIDEARA ST. CLAIRE – YOUR NEW FAVOURITE ENTREPRENEUR

Sideara St. Claire is a fashion designer, actress, singer, model, and photographer who is thriving in New York City & beyond. Here she delves into what it feels like being a young creative in the over saturated digital age, having to work extra hard as an independent artist, and what keeps her going (during & prior to quarantine.)

 

ABOUT

Photo by Brian Vu (taken from http://www.shopsideara.com)

 

How are you Sideara? How are you doing during quarantine?

Hey! I’m doing great, all things considered. I feel extremely lucky to be safe and healthy, and have food and resources right now. That being said I have been struggling with anxiety again, as well as taking a while to figure out how to find motivation and inspiration. I feel extremely low energy and it’s hard to even fill out this questionnaire if I’m being honest. We’re in a global crisis, I’m amazed you’ve contacted me and been pursuing all of this right now. You’re amazing!! 

To me, you show that an artist can delve into different types of art. You’re an artist, but in detail you’re a fashion designer, singer, actress, model, etc. I think a lot of people are now realizing they can publicly label themselves as a “photographer,” but also a “creative director, singer, designer, etc.) If you have the skills and you want to be involved in different types of projects, you just have to do it. How do you feel about this?

I have no idea how to feel about it, honestly! In some ways I’m really jealous of people who have one focus, because they have that focus. When you do a lot of things it can be difficult to harness the time and organization needed in order to truly pursue everything. I live my life with a lot of hopeful trust and cognitive dissonance, *laughs*. At the same time, I really can’t bare to give up any of my passions, and I love being fully participatory in all of them (for Shop Sideara, not only do I do the designs, but I do the majority of the photography, all of the web design, social media, etc). This is largely out of need, considering I’m not at a place where I can hire other people yet, but it’s also an excuse to spend my time doing and exploring more things that I love. I believe participating in other mediums helps to inform and inspire your medium of choice, so even if you’re not pursuing a career in every area, or any area, experimentation in a wide variety of mediums can be extremely fulfilling. 

I lately have been thinking a lot about the idea of having a practice. I think this is a really beautiful way to live not only in terms of building your career and goals but just for living in a meditative and intentional way. Creating a rhythm in your life with what you do, with a lot of consistency, is really beautiful. You don’t need to do everything, and you don’t need to choose, either. Try your hand at multiple things and see what you really like, what makes you feel excited and alive, what you can build into a practice. 

HEADPIECES BY SIDEARA

SUN RA CROWN

 

How would you best describe yourself to someone just discovering your instagram/fashion designs?

If I’m being extremely informal I’d say “hi, I do a lot of things, I make music, I act, I take photos, I design. I do everything myself. I hope you like it!!! Stream Stone.” 

Sideara – Stone

 

If you could pick three outfits to wear for a whole year, what would you pick?

If I can assume that I’d be comfortable no matter what, some high ass platforms and an all white outfit with a lot of layers, an all red outfit, and a slutty 80s party dress with big ass sleeves.

SHOP ORIGINAL EARRINGS (SHOP SIDEARA)

 

With working in the creative industry, what is something that is important to you? 

Trust. I really need to be able to trust who I work with and feel like we’re not going to judge each other. That’s especially important in music, I want to know that my ideas will be heard and I’ll be trusted and vice versa. For other aspects of the creative industry, I’d say treating every single person like they are important and worthy and cool and paying people on time. As far as self-management goes, creating deadlines. 

You recently released your first official song and music video for “Stone.” Tell us about that.

“Stone” would never have existed if I didn’t first let go of the idea of a “perfect” musical debut. I struggled for many years to even share that I make music. Out of all the mediums I work in, I feel that music provides the least shelter to hide behind. It’s you, just you. I wrote most of that song while I was in a really deep hole with someone, and I found myself stuck in that hole even after they were gone. Creating the song and video helped me to find my way back home.

Working with my co- director John Curtis to build a narrative, I found myself fascinated with the grey area of reality that gaslighting can create. What if I took all the lies and the skewed narratives and embraced them? What if I became the villain I was made out to be, and mixed that with the victim I was also made out to be? And what if I don’t fucking care anymore either, and let myself have fun within both of those false identities? Through the video I was able to play with those force fed narratives, and through the song I was able to be honest about how it felt to be in that position. 

Scene from the music video for “Stone.” Directed by Sideara St. Claire, John Edwards Curtis.

 

Are there any other projects you are working on that you would like to talk about?

More music!!! Hopefully a new collection once I can get back in the laser cutter – right now I’m experimenting with one-offs in different materials. Striving to find more ecological mediums and techniques. Hoping that I can get back into everything soon and learn how to thrive without my usual means of creation as well. Also the project of redefining my own ideas of success and productivity. Usually the more I let go of control and ideas of capitalist success, the more (and better quality) work I end up creating.

 

To keep up with Sideara, you can follow her on:

Instagram- @sideara, @shopsideara (for accessory products)

YouTube- Sideara St. Claire

Spotify- Sideara (Stream “Stone”!)

~ To access Sideara’s portfolio, head to www.sideara.com

~ To check out Sideara’s 100% original accessories, go to www.shopsideara.com

HIDDEN MUSIC GEMS

NEW MUSIC FOR YOUR WEEKEND

 

LISTEN UP THIS AFTERNOON:

1. “Shut Up” by New Years Day

New Years Day span a lot of different sub-genres in rock/metal to me personally. They’re a band I’ve gotten the chance to watch grow since I was 15, and branch off and grow constantly into different and progressed forms of themselves. But of course while still being totally spooky, punk, and most importantly fresh and themselves.

“Shut Up” (off their 2019 album “Unbreakable) is an anthem for those not being listened to. It has catchy almost hard pop sounds and melodies (to me, hard pop is up beat pop music that has a big “punch” sonically,) while still being industrial, dancey, and full of rough played instruments and bass. For those who are fans of catchy music that you can also get down and mosh dance to, take a listen. Personally, I like to blast it while driving.

2. “We Are Free” by Rose McGowan

Rose McGowan’s album experience “Planet 9” has finally reached the internet waves from it’s space land. “Planet 9” is a meditative, yet trance force of a record that is meant to open your mind, help everyone feel less lonely, and meant to be listened to with the lights off to experience the full realm of frequencies. We’re about to have some deep mind trips ya’ll. Go to Rose’s social platforms to read about the full instructions for listening and descriptions.

“We Are Free” is my personal favourite off of the album. During my time with the lights off last night, this was the one that had my mind feeling floaty and yes “free.” I felt feelings of nostalgia if I was in space. It made me want to cry, dance, and run all at the same time. Sonically, this is a jam that also makes you think and gives me vibes of french futuristic trance. Try to listen to the lyrics as well as the production for the best feeling. This is Rose’s journey that she also wants to be ours, in the sound waves together.

3. “Bend Over Backwards” by Lennon Stella 

Lennon Stella’s debut album “Three. Two. One.” was released last night at midnight. I think this is one of the most versatile music releases of the year. There are acoustics, 70s psychedelic production, raw and soothing vocals, brooding and somber beats, and more. Lennon’s voice is so well done on it’s own that she could put out an album with just her voice and you could connect with it. I can’t yet pick a favourite.

On “Bend Over Backwards,” Lennon delivers a song that I would picture being played at the after party of the most recent Woodstock that never happened. Her vocals go perfectly with the slow jam guitars as they go from being “whispy” to deeper and raspy, and the chorus has awesome short segments of high pitched Tame Impala like trippy vocals. I’m finding the more I listen to this song, it gets better and I hear different parts that I didn’t hear on the first listen. This song and album as a whole are so layered and packed with different stripped back sides of Lennon’s artistry. I hate throwing the word “masterpiece” around lightly, but this is timeless and doesn’t belong to any specific genre or era.

4. “Cult Logic” by Miike Snow 

Miike Snow is very underrated in my opinion. This Swedish band gives off perfect summer night festival feelings, with very unconventional lyric tones from the lead singer. On “Cult Logic,” it’s hazy, chopped and skewed in fun ways, and also has a great one drop synth beat in its background. The raw vocals are calm and softer, and also get high pitched and made me reminisce of Prince’s high toned voice. This is a great song to be on a loop at a party or as you go through a walk with friends aimlessly.

5. “No Place” by Rufus Du Sol

I recently discovered the band Rufus Du Sol when I watched their YouTube live set in Joshua Tree. They performed all by themselves as their music vibrated across the desert as the sun was setting. I have never seen something so greatly executed and paired. Sometimes, I tend to be disappointed when I watch certain live performances on video, but Rufus Du Sol made me feel like I was there with them.

Their electronic beat soundscapes make you feel like you’re in a spirit body totally free with no weight on you. I feel so loose when I listen to this band with their echoing edits on their vocals, and when they are raw and powerful as their beats increase in energy. On “No Place,” the beat draws up force as the vocals do the same, and go from slower to fuller and louder. The lead singer Tyrone Lindqvist’s vocals make me feel emotion and make listeners feel like they know what he is singing about. I think it’s such a cool thing when vocalists can make you feel that much emotion that you feel like you know them, just from hearing their voice. The band is great with production and creates music that doesn’t have the vocals and production separate, but together. You can tell it’s made with so much thought because you can listen to it as one piece. That’s harder to capture than you think.

MY GREGG ARAKI STORY

 

Gregg Araki. New Queer Cinema. Both are statements in their own right. When I describe Gregg Araki or New Queer Cinema to friends who have no idea about Gregg or his Teenage Apocalypse Trilogy, the most simple way I can explain them is that if you’re meant to find them, you will. And I don’t mean that in a “you’re not cool enough” type way, but at the same time if you are weird enough and into campy & dark acid like teen films, you will find them. These films are for the outcasts who think differently, who view the world in a different and skewed format. 

 

Processed with VSCO with a7 preset

Processed with VSCO with a7 preset

DVD’s for “The Doom Generation” & “Nowhere” (Araki films on DVD have by far been the hardest for me to find. I guard these with my life.)

Processed with VSCO with a7 preset

Processed with VSCO with a7 preset

 

Rewinding back to my early “tween years,” I became really interested in indie/teen films that happened to be from the 90s to early 2000s era. They were different and not all of them were actually progressive in some ways, but a lot of them brought forward real types of teen culture that people were afraid to show. They seemed more fun to me than what my generation and I were getting fed at the time. From “I Know What You Did Last Summer” to “Scream,” teens were being shown as angsty & strong headed, silly, narcissistic, but also intelligent. That’s what I personally thought was great about that time from the looking glass of where I experienced it. There were depictions of realistic teens and then there were the parody-like and artificial archetypes in campy, funny yet dark films that were meant to poke fun at how older generations looked at teenagers in the 90s. 

Firstly, I discovered Sarah Michelle Gellar and Rose McGowan and became enamoured by their filmography. There was no one like them around in films (both different, but with similar messaging.) This led me to discover Gregg Araki and his “Teenage Apocalypse Trilogy” (Rose had roles in both “The Doom Generation” & “Nowhere.” I remember how much I followed the rules back then. I watched the trailers for both “Doom” & “Nowhere” so many times. Until I was finally allowed to order them online when I was beginning high school. But then I let myself watch “Mysterious Skin” (another Araki film) online when I was in grade 5. I don’t know why I thought this was better for me to watch at that age? It really affected me, but I did think it was an amazing film. It’s definitely one close to my heart.

But both “Doom” & “Nowhere” (There is also another film in the trilogy called “Totally Fucked Up”) were unlike any type of film I had ever witnessed. The cinematography, nihilistic tones against the hatred towards different types of youth in America, were both things I was never taught in school. Gregg was my schooling for queer individuals. I related to these hyper, colourful, and angry characters. Without them, my art and my character wouldn’t be the same. They took me up in a space shuttle and set me free into the world I never knew I was longing for. Even right down to the soundtrack. I felt like I needed to be at these parties in “Nowhere.” 

The green landscape photo is one of my photography pieces. However, I decided to contrast it with the Japanese (according to ebay) poster print for Doom. I absolutely love how it was designed.

Within the past 10 years (with tumblr, indie cinema gaining more attention due to the Internet, etc.) there’s been a resurgence in popularity towards Gregg’s films. There’s more young people who have now found these films that are nearly 25 years old now. These people now resonate with the themes that the films display (from the amazingly weird designed sets, random cameos and scenery that felt so well composed.) What is it with Gregg that finds more people drawn to his films and elements as the years go by? What I think is that Gregg’s films don’t try to be something they’re not. They don’t try to act “a little edgy,” while still being accessible to big mainstream studios and audiences. They are in your face, certainly not for everyone, and going at full speed with power, sex, violence, and real issues that adolescents faced in the 90s in America. The same exact problems may have changed for the latest generation, but the problems are still there in different ways. Young people still have reasons to fight back (i.e., wage equality, sexual assault, racism, toxic masculinity, etc.) These young people who are realizing they are fighters and can change the world are becoming inspired by people (in this case a filmmaker,) who doesn’t hold anything back when it comes to the troubles that queer youth have to go through. Even as an adult. 

The fact that there’s also a whole community of people who love Gregg’s films & New Queer Cinema can be really heartwarming. To me, when I find out someone is an Araki fan, it’s one of those things where I automatically can tell this person is wicked cool and understands the outcast way of life and thinking. I’m in shock that they aren’t bigger than they are, but I love that the Internet gave these films a new light beyond the indie film buff community. For not being on any internet movie platform, these kinds of stories from the 80s-90s era can sometimes fade into obscurity. But with a story and aesthetic as strong as these films give, it’s hard to not have these titles rise up in admiration again (whether it’s on Twitter & Instagram gifs, clothing lines, inspiring new dark teen films, etc.)

Imagine how cool it would be if there were more behind the scenes documentaries from the sets of the Apocalypse films? Personally, the most visuals I’ve ever seen were from makeup artist Jason Rail’s instagram account (@nosajliar on instagram) who actually worked on many Gregg Araki films back in the 90s, and now shares candid polaroids from his time on the sets. Every picture he shares is gold. From snapshots of Guillermo Diaz, Mena Suvari, Traci Lords, etc. It feels like things were truly indie & fun in the 90s because it looked like indie films truly didn’t have the amount of help they do now (in certain circumstances.) It seems like these artists behind the scenes worked hard and Gregg made sure the films were made the way he wanted. I even heard the sets in “Doom” & “Nowhere” were handmade. From the outwardly cool polkadot backdrop red, white, and blue backdrop to all the checkerboard print hotel rooms, this was DIY at its finest.

If you feel alone in your friend group, feel like an outsider in life, feel like the world doesn’t like people like you, Gregg’s films are for you. Especially films like “Nowhere” & “Doom.” And with lines like “look, you fucking chunky pumpkinhead!,” where can you go wrong?

#JUSTICEFORNOWAPOCALYPSE 

HIDDEN MUSIC GEMS – First Edition

NEW INDIE FOR YOUR WEEKEND

Here (*hear*) some new gems your ears need to experience:

1. “Stone” by Sideara

Sideara’s voice to me sounds very angelic. But her voice on “Stone” also reminds me of Stevie Nicks and Fairuza Balk with its raspy tones. It’s a song sonically that I never feel like I’ve heard before, but it’s definitely something I’ve been waiting for in new music. With the music video perfectly matching up the song with it being shot in an empty warehouse and has abstract shots of Sideara in a glass container with a metal cage covering the top, it definitely makes the song even more powerful.

This song reminds me of something that a cool avant-garde club kid would make in the 90s, while it also gives a heavy futurist theme to me with its spooky somber beats and high pitched slow burn rasp/angry moments. The more you listen to this one the more you peel back layers of wicked productions, hard work, and vocals that are hard to match up to anyone else with how many different styles Sideara plays with. This is only one song and I already feel like Sideara is giving us endless fairy like and dark edgy creations.

2. “Laugh It Off” by Chelsea Jade

I first came across Chelsea Jade when I first travelled to Vancouver. Their music goes great with any type of traveling adventures, with it being upbeat but with a “cool” flow that makes you want to sing alone whilst running down the street. The best part is the humming sound behind the start of each chorus. “Laugh It Off” is a fun indie summer jam.

3. “Too Late” by Washed Out

Washed Out never feel out of date to me. Ever since I discovered them in 2013 scrolling through tumblr (the days,) this band has never left my mind. And that feeling it gives you. Think retro sounding beats and synths with a lot of ambience, as your mind (mine at least) gets picturesque beautiful landscapes in your head while driving down a lonesome coast. I think they are the lords of acing the sound of tropical dreamscapes. “Too Late” is a comeback that feels somber, but has both production and vocals that needs to be heard with headphones or blasted on a pink clouded summer night. Be right back while I listen to this for hours on repeat and explore.

4. “People, I’ve been sad” by Christine and the Queens

Revolutionary french artist Christine and the Queens creates masterpiece after masterpiece. It’s no surprise to me that this song has been in my head almost weekly since it’s release. The sound of their voice makes words enunciate beautifully, with lyrics that feel like they float over you as you hear them. For those who like electronic art pop, this will be one of your favourite new driving songs to sing out when you’re feeling shit. I don’t know if it’s a type of electronic drum in the background (I don’t play instruments,) but that sound pairing with the pulsing and sultry synth production is amazing. Take a listen.

5. “Unspun” by Jackie

New Canadian band Jackie hits hard with their song “Unspun.” This is music to riot to and I love it. With hard bass, guitars, and vocals that feel like they are sneering at you as their being said, what can make this song better? This is the only song I’ve heard from Jackie so far, but it’s rememberable and I think the best punk song I’ve heard in 2020. We don’t hear too much raw punk anymore. Not to put that label on it, but the attitude and roughness that this song delivers gives those who like harder music a taste of something that gets in your face and certainly doesn’t hide behind any shit.

6. “Bends” by The Chain Gang Of 1974, ft. TWINKIDS

The Chain Gang Of 1974 doesn’t have anything remotely unsatisfying in their discography. Every single song by Chain has given me nostalgic memories and even some that I haven’t actually experienced, but feel like I am feeling. Production wise they are serving bits of shoegaze candy (for those who don’t know Shoegaze, watch any Gregg Araki film and listen to the soundtracks) that make you truly take a moment and ingest what you are hearing. You kind of forget what life is until you finish listening to Chain Gang’s music and this song in particular. I think that’s the best way I personally could compliment Chain Gang.

On this new double single, Track 1 “Bends” it gives you vibes of daydreaming and staring at your ceiling at 3 AM, while also being dancey and 80s. Listen to this song and I promise you you will fall down into a loophole of all of their music.

See you next week Friday!

*All photos are screenshots taken from Spotify*

WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO “BE A MAN”

Being put out into the world as a “man,” I grew up as a “boy.” But even as a child, I didn’t feel like I personally needed to bring it up as my label. Fast forward to now, I identify under the male gender. “Male-ish” some might say. From days where I want to wear boots with a heel on them, to days where I have a beard, to days where I never wear a Sports jersey. 

Photo by Stacey Newman Photography

A part of me has always been judged by a lot of people around me growing up. I know it was the same for others. I think a lot of us are still looked at weirdly if we do not appear to look like someone’s preferred version of what they want. This has caused me to be afraid of a lot of men in particular because of my struggles with most of them behaving around me as I progressed in age. And I don’t mean that to disrespect all men, and I don’t want to generalize any gender fully. I don’t want this to be the truth either. I wish it wasn’t. I want all people to be accepting, but some can’t because of their own belief systems that were taught to them by those who raised them. Telling men they are the “power of the world” is damaging. Every harmful thing that we pass on is killing another person’s true self and ripping them apart internally. 

What should we do to end this? Stop telling someone they need to change. If it’s not harming themselves or those around them, it shouldn’t matter. Too many true humans are robbed of their individuality and this is something they never agreed to giving away. What will happen if we don’t keep pushing against this? The cycle keeps moving. And once passed on, it tells us men and actually everyone that if we don’t like the thought of being a sports player prodigy, that we are less than. I know it’s not an entire gender’s fault. It’s the fault of those who continue to push that toxic dividing narrative (men or women,) and those who don’t fight to change their own or other’s ways.

It’s how certain people look at me and a lot of us for being different than something they may not see within themselves. How myself and a lot of others are given dirty looks just because we aren’t wearing stereotypical get up. There was a time when I used to change how my voice sounded and my body language around most males that were around me.  I didn’t want to change myself because it felt inauthentic, but there were times where it felt like an act of survival mode kicking in so I didn’t feel judged. On one hand I didn’t care about those who didn’t understand me, but on the other it was also hard for me to deal with in a public or group setting. This can be seen as backwards, but why? The reason I did this was because I was still trying to unpack different types of rules ingrained into my character. Yet I still catch myself because we are all human and all adaptable. And if we keep letting others control what we become adjusted to, we’re going to be hurt and mentally hijacked. 

I think a lot of people in general can still use a lot of improvement. Start by not judging the person wearing heavy makeup, not caring if another man wants to look a certain way that’s different than you, not pushing certain roles onto someone because of how you think they should be, etc. I think it can actually get more simple to unpack once you are aware of the fact that so many societal roles are not ones you have to abide by. We also don’t deserve an answer to why someone looks or talks a certain way. When you tell me or someone else to “be a man,” you’re telling us to be gnarlier, to reach for that football winding in the sky, to do what I need to do to be put integrated into society as “the man” I should be. It’s just like when you tell a woman or anyone to be the version of what you think they are. Do all of us want the key to a happy life? That would be to let your true self fly and break out. Who are you really? It’s your choice. 

It’s the certain parts of “bro culture,” it’s the women who want to have a gay best friend “oh so badly!”, it’s those in the gay community that think they can fondle a woman because they aren’t a regular straight man, etc. The problem reaches all communities and all people. It just sadly comes famously from straight white people a lot. Your image or group becomes a problem when your way of life harms someone else’s openly, privately, whatever. 

Processed with VSCO with c1 preset

Processed with VSCO with a6 preset

Photos by Aidan Fisher

I changed myself to who I want to be, how I want to look and when I want to change. It’s scary, but so are a lot of the people surrounding me on this earth. I don’t want to live for them. There’s amazing souls on this earth. We should let each one of them find that big self within them.

Let’s get to the real version of the future. It’s not too late to get there.

Ryder Houston- A future leader of the indie film scene speaks on “Rapture in Blue” film, his thoughts on labelling his new film “queer,” and why it’s good to push the envelope.

Ryder Houston is a young creator whose upcoming semi-full length film (approx. 50 min.) “Rapture in Blue” is about to bring new camp, exploration, and darkness to the 2020 indie film scene. This is Ryder’s second official film. His first being the 2018 short “Vamp Till Cue.”

What made you want to be a director? Would you say are a very creative person in life?

Ever since I was young, I have been interested in film. I was the kid that would be more enamoured with the behind-the-scenes than the actual movie. Pixar was a favourite, however I realized I don’t have the patience for animation. I’ve never considered myself a storyteller, but more of someone trying desperately to convey the things I feel through abstract measures. I guess that’s what an artist is. I got a little side-tracked with acting. It’s something I really enjoy, but I started realizing there were certain expressions and emotions I couldn’t get to come across in my face. I knew exactly how the story should flow, how the scene should read, but I had difficulties actually manifesting those thoughts into my performance. I found it easier to explain these things to actors. Actors who are more qualified with performing. Not to “suck my own cock,” but I do think I’m really creative. I draw, write, edit, make music, I used to sing and dance, etc. Maybe I wasn’t particularly great at the last couple of things, but I still found performing in general to be very cathartic. The Ouija board once told me I’d be a graphic designer when I grow up. I wouldn’t complain. 

BTS shot (photographed by Parker Healy,) promo shot (photographed by Ross McKay Craig)

Who/What is one of your main inspirations for your work? (i.e., a certain theme, individual, genre, etc.) 

David Lynch. That’s really evident. I fell in love with his film “Lost Highway” while writing the script for “Rapture,” and it really influenced the entire style and tone. That and the relationship I was in at the time. I love the idea of a neo-noir. You get to explore classical cinematic aesthetics and archetypes while telling a new story in a new place. It helps it feel timeless in my opinion. It’s also made me realize there really aren’t any rules. And I’ve always been drawn to the bombast of horror/terror, so that’s a given.

Promo shot (photographed by Ross McKay Craig)

You describe your first full length short “Rapture in Blue” as a psychosexual drama. The film’s protagonist is a male teen who is having complications with his girlfriend, while a new boy who moves into his past childhood home. What separates this film from other indie teen dramas? 

I’ve seen films done by other people my age and they almost always leave me frustrated. They don’t deliver the goods. They don’t take you all the way. I believe in going big or going home, giving the audience the full fantasy, hence the name of my pseudo-production company. I think “Rapture” is an immersive film, be it as it may. It’s really a suspension of reality in a very dreadful kind of way.

Do you find that films that have an “atmospheric alternate reality” type theme to them are more interesting than other “realistic indie character driven” films? Can they go hand in hand? What are your thoughts on this & labeling films?

I don’t believe one or the other is inherently true. Both styles can explore deep depths each in their own right. Labeling films this way is a dangerous thing, though. A label I am especially hesitant on slapping onto “Rapture” is “LGBTQ” or “queer”, since I think a lot of queer films made by people around my age are very superficial and just barely poke the surface. It’s always about bullying or not being accepted by your parents, which are big deals in reality, but are a lot of the times handled on screen in a very elementary way. The latter theme is actually explored in “Rapture,” but I think in a more doomish kind of way. I don’t treat the concept as something so suburban. It is a queer film, but it really isn’t.

Promo shots (photographed by Ross McKay Craig)

Since creating this film, has this really pushed you into a “creative hole”? 

Oh, God, yes. Sadly, creating a film of this stature, albeit merely half the length of a regular feature, is a horrible feat when you’re left with most of the work by yourself. The writing, the pre-production, coordinating every detail, budgeting and buying each prop out of pocket, then meticulously sculpting every element of the picture in post really takes a toll on your life. I’m not complaining. I wouldn’t trust anyone else to do it all! The best part, even though it was the most horrifying, was the shooting, itself. Directing and working with my generous crew was one of the most human things I’ve ever done. I am sort of an isolated person in my everyday life. On set, we all knew it was do or die. It forced a change in personality. It was so refreshing. I can’t wait to do it again. Speaking of which, I have already begun writing the next script— a full feature length picture!!

How would you like people to view you as an artist? 

Things just wanna be the way they wanna be. That’s something I started saying since we started production. I’m not gonna force anything. I don’t want to be seen as pretentious, a show-off, as superficial… I’m just doing what I want to do. I don’t control it. These things come out the way they were meant to be. It’s fate, that way. I believe in fate. See, that sounded pretentious!

To someone who has never come across your work before, what could they expect from “Rapture in Blue”?

“Rapture in Blue” is a high-camp melodrama. It’s really up there, theatrical and surreal. It’s like that for a reason. I want to make that clear.

When can we expect “Rapture in Blue“ to be released? What platforms will it be available on? Have you gotten any attention yet from any upcoming film festivals? 

It’s all up in the air. I’m putting the finishing touches on it and it will be 100% complete come March. I would like to do a local screening March 12th, but I have to consider festival rules, or if I’m even submitting to festivals. I actually am seeking consultation on the topic as we speak. I know the film is an odd length, but it feels so right the way it is. It really covers all its bases in that regard. It’s just up to what others will think of what’s been done. I want to put it on Amazon Prime Video, but I don’t want it to die there. It’s all a risk, I just have to decide which is more worth it, and quick. A festival run, or a public release. I say both, but it’s so complicated.

All promo images were photographed by Ross McKay Craig. Behind The Scenes shot photographed by Parker Healy.

For more info on “Rapture in Blue,” you can: 

Follow Ryder on Intsagram: @-ryderhouston

“Like” the “Rapture in Blue” Facebook page:  “Rapture in Blue” Official Facebook Page

Watch the trailer: RAPTURE IN BLUE – OFFICIAL TRAILER

Kat DeLeone: Singer with a raw voice & a punchy passion for creating

Kat DeLeone is a singer based in the San Diego, California area who creates acoustic covers of songs she feels inspired by, wants to pay homage to, and are apart of her musical taste and style. With a future in creating her own music, Kat’s voice is raw, unconventional, and fierce. 

Hi Kat, how are you? 

Hi Aidan! I’m great! Things could be better though. As of right now, I’m suffering from a cold, but I guess that gives me time to try to relax and write. 

What does your name mean to you? 

My “stage name” that I go by is “Kat DeLeone,” which is not my given name. However, Kat is my nickname that everyone calls me by, and DeLeone was my great, great aunt’s last name. 

What kind of art do you do?

Currently, I sing and currently perform acoustic covers with my guitarist, Tyler White. I write original lyrics, but have held off on releasing original material until I find a complete set of skilled musicians to back me up. One of my favorite covers with Tyler can be found here: https://youtu.be/cClRh7F9WhA We covered Taker by K.I.D, an amazing Canadian band. 

 

What is it like being an artist in this current societal state where are in?

What I’ve noticed is that making music right now is all about finding the right team to work with, and who share the same goals. A lot of people seem to be centered all around “me me me,” and aren’t willing to collaborate with up and coming artists. Sometimes I understand this because the music industry is very tough to break into. But being part of a team that communicates well and is willing to be open to new ideas is one of the most important parts of becoming part of the world of entertainment world. 

What are your opinions on art school? Do you personally think they help you get ahead in the industry? 

I think that art schools are a great way to make connections and put yourself out there. If someone has the opportunity to attend one, I’d say go for it—you are more likely to meet like-minded people who share similar goals. 

Who is one of your biggest inspirations? 

Skye Sweetnam of Sumo Cyco! Anyone who knows me knows how much I love Skye and the band. She’s been my biggest inspiration ever since I was eight years old. She truly puts her heart and soul into her music and is the queen of DIY!

Was there any specific moment in your life where you felt that you must do this?

When I was fifteen I started an all girl band. We were really influenced by The Runaways and Joan Jett. I’m still great friends with the guitarist who I started the band with, and we are still very passionate about music and playing rock shows. Seven years later, I’m still determined to make music a full-time thing. It’s a slow process, but I’m definitely not giving up. 

What is your favourite project you’ve been apart of/created so far?

The covers that I am releasing on YouTube have been fun, especially since I have gotten more comfortable being in a studio setting, and am learning about which songs suit my voice and which ones don’t. I can’t say it’s my favorite project, but I’m sure that it will lead up to that.

Is there anything specific you want your audience to feel when they view/listen to your work? 

I haven’t released a video of me singing yet, just audio files. I do want to release a video eventually, even if it is just an acoustic or acapella thing. However, I think it’s also important for the listener to focus on the music first and put visuals second. 

What is one word you would use to describe your work? 

Passionate.

Are there any projects you are working on currently? 

As I’ve mentioned, I’m working on covers, but I am always looking out for musicians who are willing to start a serious band. 

My socials:

Instagram: @kat.deleone

Twitter: @kat_deleone

YouTube: Kat Isabella

 

Shirnelle Williams: Portrait Photographer & true leader for the future

Shirnelle Williams is an authentic and boundary pushing photographer in the Toronto area. As a recent graduate of Humber College’s Creative Photography program and a friend to myself (we met at Humber College,) Shirnelle is now working doing photoshoots of her friends and several fellow creatives that she comes into contact with. She also creates spectacular and powerful self-portraits of herself.

Photo by Shirnelle Williams

What does your name mean to you?

My name represents individuality. I have always liked to think that I’m the only person with the name Shirnelle. Most people think that my name is pronounced “Chanel,” but I have to quickly correct them because my name is too dope and unique to be mispronounced, sorry not sorry. My name to me is creative and artistic, and I feel that I have to live up to my full potential with what my name represents.

What kind of art do you do?

The kind of art that I excel at and actually love to do is portrait photography. Before I went to Humber College for their Creative Photography program, I never really liked taking portraits of people, I mainly did nature shots or abstract photography. I think it was mainly because I was shy and socializing was not my strong suit. But as I got more comfortable with my craft and behind the camera, I slowly started realizing that portrait photography was my passion and what I wanted to do as a career.  

Photo by Shirnelle Williams

What is it like being an artist in this current societal state we’re in?

I feel like a lot of artists of all mediums are now able to flourish and have their art shown on a bigger scale due to social media, because it allows you to build an audience with similar interests. I feel like in this current climate art has come out on top weather. It is through music, fashion or design people gravitate to creative ideas and new ways of viewing how art is produced or shown to the public. It doesn’t limit you to reach people just within the city you live in, but people around the world who can view your art. I also think that people like to mimic other ideas from artists, which over populates the industry with a lot of the same things, and it lacks individuality. That’s why I want my work to be filled with “firsts.” I think these are things people have never seen before, but are inspired by the authenticity of my photography.

What are your opinions on art in school? Do you think they help you get ahead in the industry?

In my experience, I think going to school for photography only helped me to advance my skills and figure out what area of photography I wanted to pursue. It honestly didn’t help me get a job in the industry after finishing my program. I feel like most employers don’t care what school you went to or how high your grades were. They tend to be focused on what you can bring to the table and how you can benefit their company. I want to start my own business because I believe in my abilities and I know that when it comes to photography I go above and beyond. When I get a concept in my head, I just run with it and create something nobody has ever really seen before. I just want to stand out and be as authentic as possible. In my opinion school can help steer you in the right direction, but it’s up to you to grab at the opportunities you want in life. Never wait for it to be handed to you. Work ethic is very important.

Photo by Shirnelle Williams

Photo by Shirnelle Williams

Who is one of your biggest inspirations?

This is a pretty tough question for me because I don’t have a specific person that inspires me, but I am inspired by the youth and the people in my generation. I feel like the youth have been taking over this past year with their innovative ideas, and also being able to put themselves out there and achieve success in their early 20’s or younger. The youth is either building a following on social media, using platforms like Instagram or YouTube to show the world what they’re creating, etc. Two examples of young people achieving their goals and making a difference in the world are Jaden Smith and an actor named Marsai Martin. 

Jaden Smith has an organization called “Just Water.” The organization distributes 100% spring water in a paper-based bottle and a plant-based cap to reduce the use of plastic, which pollutes the ocean. “Just Water” allows for a better option for drinking water and provides a positive impact on the environment. Marsai Martin is a young black actor from the TV show “Black-ish,” and is also starring in a new movie called “Little.” The 14 year old actor will become the youngest executive producer in Hollywood history for coming up with the idea for the movie Little. I think she is showing young people that you can have a voice in the entertainment industry and be successful. It’s all about drive and confidence when it comes to pitching an idea that your passionate about. Jaden and Marsai are both equally inspiring because they’re showing the youth that you can achieve your goals at any age and be successful.

Was there any specific moment in your life where you felt like you must do this?

The specific moment where I felt like this was when I went on a family vacation to New York City. It was my first time ever going to the city, and I was about 13 years old. At the time I was using a very low quality iPod touch camera to take my pictures. I took a bunch of photos during that trip, but there was one specific photo that stood out from the rest and made me realize that I wanted to this for the rest of my life. It was a photograph of my mom and our family friend sitting outside at a table with an umbrella in the centre.  The sun was hitting their faces perfectly, they were laughing and enjoying life. At that moment it clicked for me. Then for Christmas, my mom bought me a Fuji Film camera that I used nonstop throughout my 4 years of high school. 

What is your favourite project you’ve been apart of/created? 

I would have to say an assignment I did in college where I had to shoot inside an industrial location. The photograph had to have meaning behind it and the image needed to make sense with the location. I got my friend Daijon to model for me (she’s a low-key model.) The location that I picked was a kitchen and the concept was how women are stereotyped for only being good in the kitchen or a housewife, which is far from the truth. The way I set up the image was one hand tied to the sink and the other tied to the oven. She had an unimpressed facial expression and a red light shining in the back of her to represent anger. After editing the picture, it came out way too fire for words and I got a 100% on that assignment. 

Photo by Shirnelle Williams

Is there anything specific you want your audience to feel when they see your work?

I want them to see that I’m a portrait photographer, producing gallery quality images that tell a story through expression and mood. I seek to bring out the unique beauty from the simple and ordinary throughout all of my work as well as evoke inspiration and emotion through my images. I enjoy capturing people in their own element to get their true personality. My goal is to produce content that pushes boundaries and exceeds expectations with my innovative ideas and unique perspectives. 

What is one word you would use to describe your work?

Unique.

Are there any projects you are working on currently?

Right now there is nothing specific that I’m working on. Sometimes I have 100 ideas and other times I’m just not inspired at all. It really just depends, but I’m hoping to start my own portrait photography business and building my social media following in the near future.

You can follow Shirnelle’s photography accounts on Instagram: 

@- shirnellephotos

@- shirnellewilliams